The sexual snag
by NightCoffee
Summary: Henry is in his budding, both romantically with Violet and sexually. He is royally embarrassed by everything and nothing, and he is beginning to understand the well of feelings and reactions a simple kiss can create. And Regina and Robin are kissing constantly! Set in the same universe as my story Meatloaf. Rated M because I'm paranoid.
1. Chapter 1

108 Mifflin street had gone to sleep. Not a light switched on, not a toe out of bed. Henry, though, was not asleep. He couldn't sleep, and for about a fortnight, he had been unable to fall asleep until well into the small hours. Like all the previous nights, he listened, and to his utter horror, imagined what happened down the hall, two doors away. He knew he could hear unusual noises through the doors and walls. That's how he knew if his mother got sick in the night, for instance. He shuddered at the thought. The sound of retching was horrible, but ever since he started school, his initial reaction had been to run to her and comfort her like she did him. It never ceased to baffle him, how he couldn't keep away. Luckily, she wasn't often sick, and that usually happened after he had passed his viruses on to her. Nowadays, however, she had brought the bouts of sickness on herself, with a dash of help from Robin. And _that_ was the main reason for Henry's insomnia.

He didn't trust them, not an inch. Every chance they got, they were liplocked and sending each other the most smouldering and embarrassing looks he had ever witnessed. They were his grandparents times ten, and even worse than his other mom and Hook. Maybe. They were probably about the same level, but still not. He was still a bit confused about how different they felt to him, and how he was repulsed by one pair and mildly exasperated by the other. In fact, he felt about Emma and Hook now like he felt about Robin and Regina before the whole frozen Marian-stuff.

And because they were not to be trusted, he was listening for conspicuous and incriminating sounds. Was that rustling of bed sheets he could hear? Or creaking of a bed? But no. Only deafening silence. His mother had probably used a silencing spell. It would be just like her.

Most of all, he wanted to get the thoughts out of his head, but that seemed futile. He couldn't pinpoint the exact moment his thoughts had shifted from amusement and teasing of his mother because of her total crush on Robin, to the bizarre slide show that rolled before his eyes every time he saw them kissing. After all, she _had_ become pregnant at one point or another before Robin went to New York, and thus they would have had to have sex. And before that? How may times? They had, after all, known each other for a year before returning to Storybrooke. Plenty of time to do the nasties. And it felt nasty. _He_ was getting the hots by getting a peck on the cheek from Violet, not to mention how he would burst if he ever performed something close to the quite heavy snogging sessions Robin and Regina were engaging in every opportunity they got.

The silence was still ringing in the room as he strained his ears yet again for any nasty sounds, but none came. Only in his head. Creaking beds, silent moans and grunts. To his great dismay, his thoughts had opened the blood flow to his pelvic region, and his pyjamas were tenting in a highly embarrassing way. He did _not_ want this reaction now! And he would certainly not deal with it in the easiest way with his mind set the way it was. He got out of bed and headed for the bathroom. A shower should get things back to normal. He hoped.

Cold showers were desperately cold, and he gasped for air when he first stepped in under the fall. In what seemed like no time, he was shivering, and although his problem wasn't completely solved, he hoped it would go down soon. As he stepped out of the showers, a soft knock on the door made him jump and skid on the floor. He landed on his side with an audible "oumfh!".

"Henry? Are you all right?!"

The scared squeak and rattling of the knob made it quite clear that his fall had made his mother on the other side of the door panic slightly. He sat up and checked himself for damage.

"Yeah, I just fell when I stepped out of the shower. Go to bed, mom!", he groaned as he reached for the towel and started to dry himself off.

"Why are you showering in the middle of the night, honey?"

He choked another groan while thinking up a plausible answer.

"I forgot earlier"

"You need to get back to sleep"

"Yeah, I know. But why are you up?" He put on his pyjamas again, and was ready to go out – except he didn't really want to face her just yet.

"Couldn't sleep. And then I heard the shower going, and you weren't in bed. I worry about you."

"Don't worry. I'm a big boy. You need your sleep."

He opened the door. She looked haggard, and he muttered "Yeah, you _really_ need to sleep."

"I know. It's just not so easy."

"Go back and snuggle with Robin. That always seems to help." He felt terrible for himself, but it was always the solution for her.

"He's not here" she shrugged. "He went out with Little John for an I don't know after you went to bed."

Well, then he could at least sleep tight for the rest of the night.

"Anything I can do for you, Mom?"

She yawned and shook her head. "No. I'll be fine."

"Okay. Night!"

He padded back to his room, and with a stupid feeling of guilt, slipped under the covers and fell asleep immediately.

* * *

Saturday morning, and he was going to spend the weekend at his other mom's house. Robin was not home yet, as far as he could hear, but he knew his mother was downstairs with Roland.

He packed his overnight bag in a hurry and stomped down the stairs. The minute Robin was home, they would be at it all over, and he didn't feel like being there to witness it. On the other hand, with him being away, there was no stopping it – unless Roland was being nosey. He really hoped his – step brother? Yeah, he assumed he had to be his stepbrother – was wreaking havoc over the weekend.

As he put on his shoes and jacket, he slung a _"bye"_ over his and was out the door before his mother had had a chance to answer or come out and hug him goodbye. It was better this way. He didn't know if he wanted to stay close to her at all times to keep an eye on her, or not to see her at all. Yes, it was probably for the better if he kept away. That way she didn't need to tiptoe around him either - because he knew she did. She was handling him as if he was going to run away from her at the second she stepped out of line.


	2. Chapter 2

Regina couldn't stop crying. She knew it was stupid, but she just couldn't help herself. Henry had yet again left the house with nothing more than a "bye" slung over his shoulder before she had the chance to say anything.

This particular Saturday morning was nothing out of the ordinary, per se, but Henry _was_ staying with Emma and Hook for the weekend, and it just wasn't helping her mood. The weeks after they returned from Camelot had been a jumble of ups and downs, with the Charmings and Emma going to the Underworld to get back Hook. She would never have guessed that they actually managed it – least of all without her, but sometimes people surprise you.

She felt rejected, and nothing Robin or Roland would do could relieve the pain and fear. It felt like a one-sided breakup, and she had no idea what exactly she had done wrong and how to right it again. When Henry backed off last time, she did at least understand why, and thus what she needed to do – no matter how hard it was. This time, all she could think had changed was her pregnancy. The few days between the return of Henry's memories and Marian's return were blissfully happy, and Henry seemed over the moon by the fact that Robin Hood was dating his mom. The fact that he had acquired an adorable little sidekick who thought he hung the stars, hadn't put a damper on his enthusiasm either. Henry's enjoyment over Robin and Roland hadn't deterred as far as she knew, but he was constantly keeping her at arm's length.

During Robin's stay in New York, Henry had been the most supportive and attentive son and companion she could ask for. In fact, she had had to tell him _not_ to fuss so much. He was, after all, her son and it was not his job to take care of her. And he had vehemently protested, because he was going to be a big brother, and big brothers protect their smaller siblings, in or out of mom's belly. And then they had returned, and Henry's attitude had changed. She didn't know exactly when the change happened, but the early signs were there the moment they returned from New York. Every time she kissed Robin more than a quick peck on the cheek, Henry reacted as if they were at it. And he had on quite a few occasions uttered his disgust by the very notion. To her utter dismay, Roland had adopted his reactions, and he had been a notorious tattle tale who served no other purpose than getting Henry more nervous and paranoid.

This new obsession of Henry's had spurred a new urge in her. The more obsessed he was by her _not_ having sex, the more she wanted it. This was entirely new to her, and she didn't know exactly how to cope. Robin had made it clear more than once during the last weeks that he was more than willing to resume more strenuous activities in bed, but Regina had turned him down every time. Firstly, because she simply didn't do such things during pregnancy. Secondly, if she _did_ want to forego her principles (she did! She really did!), she was _not_ doing anything of the sort as long as Henry was acting the way he was. So, her tears were quite complex, and she didn't know how to stop them. Oh, not exactly. Henry would be able to stop the main flow. Everything else was just icing on the cake. In her more desperate moments, she would have a fleeting wish that she never had become pregnant in the first place, but then her despicable thoughts were often interrupted by small but distinct kicks against her insides, and she would cry even harder at her wicked (oh no, not wicked, evil, maybe, but probably more despicable after all) thoughts. She couldn't wish either of her children out of existence. But Henry! Her little prince! She would give anything to have him back!

Kicks. Spud was a record breaker. 23 weeks gestation – 21 weeks she had been growing. She was still going strong, and this was the one greatest joy Regina would cling to. She had vowed to think positive about this. She had done everything she could keep healthy, keep away from dangers, mainly physical harm. No stress… Well...less stress. Even Snow had been helping in that department. In the more carefree moments, she was revelling in the feeling of being pregnant. She had loved the feeling back in the Enchanted Forest, but with every miscarriage, the fear had increased and the joy was almost snuffed out. As were the children. This time around, though, she was nearing the time where a live birth would potentially result in a very premature, but living child. With a possible living future.

She didn't know how much time had passed since she had left Roland in the kitchen with his breakfast to go and have a breakdown in the living room. All she knew, was that the warm little body that crawled up in the sofa and draped himself against her was at least partly fed and sated. His hand sneaked beneath her sweater and felt warm, clammy and sticky, and she suspected she had to wipe jam off at least his face, his hands and her stomach.

"Don't cry, Regina" he murmured.

She couldn't answer. She could hardly keep in a sob, but sniffed loudly instead and put her arm around him.

"I don't like when you cry!"

His voice was beginning to croak, and she had to compose herself to give an answer.

"It's getting so much better when you cuddle with me. I'll be all right in a bit"

She kissed the top of his head, and he sighed and snuggled closer.

"Is she moving?"

The little hand moved across her belly, still sticky, but now warm and dry.

"Almost all the time," she smiled and took his hand, putting it on a spot close to her left hip. "Feel it? She's saying hello to her big brother"

He sat up and beamed at her. "I feel it! She's really in there!"

Regina couldn't keep her giggle at bay.

"Yes she is. You can even talk and sing to her, and she will hear you. That way she will know your voice when she comes out."

"Can I sing to her now?" he asked in amazement.

"Of course you can."

He scooted down and started singing to her belly, and was in the middle of the fifth song when the front door opened and closed, and Robin came in.

"Papa!" Roland shouted and pushed himself up by his hands, not minding that he put all his weight on Regina's belly. She let out an _"oumfh"_ and sat up straighter and kneaded her sides a bit.

"Roland, you have to be careful. That hurt,"

"Sorry Regina,"

He bowed his head and looked up at her with apologetic eyes.

"That's all right. Just don't put your full weight on people. And particulrarly not on your baby sister – in or out of my belly" she smiled.

Robin came into the living room and Roland ran towards him.

"Hey you two! What have you been up to?"

He scooped up Roland and went over to Regina to give her a kiss.

"Just having breakfast" she said when he stood back up. He looked at her and frowned.

"Love, have you been crying?"

She sighed

"It's nothing"

"I don't believe you"

 _No you probably don't._

 __He wouldn't let this go, and she did not want to vent in front of Roland. Luckily she had a suitable task ready for the boy.

"Roland, could you go and wash your hands and then take the towels out of the dryer for me? Then you can find a book we can read a bit afterwards?"

He nodded vigorously and Robin put him down.

"That's bribery and child labour, you know" Robin chuckled and sat down on the sofa next to Regina.

She didn't answer, but in the wake of a sigh, all her frustration came out in one go.

"It's Henry. I can't seem to get him lately. He is absolutely obsessed with us not having sex. And it's getting on my nerves."

"Because he's stressed?"

"Yes. And because the more he frets, the hornier I get. I can't take it any longer. I feel like I'm going to explode! Or he is going to explode. I don't know what to do!"

"Well, one part of that frustration of yours could be easily remedied, my lady." he purred, and bent down to nibble on her throat.  
In a split second, where her instincts got the better of her, she gave him access to the spot that got her going quite nicely, but the moment the electric waves soared through her, she put her shoulder to her ear and cried; "Don't!"

He looked at her with a cocked eyebrow and his lip between his teeth. That smug bastard!

"It's not funny!"

"Yeah, it kind of is," he had to admit.

All her frustration and sadness suddenly rose to the surface again, and she could feel her chin wobbling treacherously.

"Then why am I not laughing?" she managed to croak, just as Roland came running back with Peter the Rabbit in his hand, ready for his reward.

"Papa!" His voice was stern and he put his hands in his side. "Why did you make Regina cry again? I had just fixed her!"

Regina got up and went over to Roland and picked him up, before she whispered in his ear just loud enough for Robin to hear;

"Because your father doesn't care that I don't feel quite all right, and he thinks it's funny to make fun of me."

With a disappointed look on his face, Roland turned to face Robin. 

"Stop bullying Regina, Papa! She doesn't like it!"

"My brave little knight," she murmured into his head, "let's go into the study and read a bit.", and with that, they left the thief to himself and his furiously annoying smirk.


End file.
